Sometimes, it’s not clear that there are any good possibilities. There are directions you can move…but none of them take you any place you would choose to go to.
If you have parents who have become older than anyone, including them, ever expected – not in years, but in abilities – you know just what I’m talking about. Things can’t go on in the comfortable way everybody is used to, and all the new options are unpleasant and unsatisfactory. But you have to choose something. Things can’t go on in the way everybody is used to.
Doors are closing. Paths are blocked. Walls are crumbling. You’re frightened and frustrated, and your parents are frightened and frustrated too, only worse. All anybody has left to lean on is love, and you wonder if even love is strong enough to see all of you through this dark, barren valley.
(I took these photos in 2005 in Chaco Canyon, New Mexico. Back in the days when my mother was coping just fine on her own.)